When I was younger I was definitely a follower.
Scared of my own shadow, I am lucky I picked out my own clothes, let alone make a decision that would impact someone else besides me.
I was shy, insecure and awkward.
I was happy to have someone tell me where to go, what to say, what to do.
I felt like it was how it should be. Who was I to be making such decisions?
So, I followed.
I followed close and without question.
Go the wrong way down a One Way street....sure, why not? You are leading me, so it must be right. I followed.
As I grew older however, I started to question the leader. Why did you go the wrong way down that street?
I still followed, but I questioned the choice.
See, when you doubt yourself and question your right to make your own decisions, you have no choice but to follow. There is no other option.
But, as time went on......
I questioned the Leader.
Maybe if I walk beside.....maybe if I can see where we are going, I won't wonder if the choice was right when we take a wrong turn.
That's growth, right?
Still, I followed.
I questioned, but I followed.
I don't know if it is because I found someone who let me grow beside them and then gave me the chance to contribute to the journey, but I find that I don't follow anymore.
I am no longer "led". I am no longer content to let my destiny depend on someone else's sense of direction.
I lead.
I might not lead anyone but myself most of the time, but I lead.
I do not follow.
I might get myself (or whomever is taking the trip with me) lost, this is true.
But, I do not follow.
I trust that if I make a wrong turn it is because I am meant to see something I didn't know was there.
I might hit road blocks, but I lead.
I am not led.
I do not follow.
